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9/20

 It's been a long stressful week for me.

Infertility updates: A couple days ago, I had my follicular ultrasound done at the RE's office, and some bloodwork. It looks like my FSH is on the high side from the results. I don't know my follicle count yet since they haven't shared it in the portal. I'm worried that I have a diminished ovarian reserve. My understanding of this is that I have less eggs than anticipated, so they are likely not as good of quality as well, which I guess kind of explains why I am having issues. I am worried then that I won't respond very well to IVF treatment and may only get a few eggs or none? I am trying not to spiral and Google but it's been really hard not to and it's making me sad. Next week I have SIS ultrasound to evaluate my uterus and all of that, and my hysteroscopy and biopsy as well with my OB. I had bloodwork done at both the RE and my regular office as well. I'm trying to see if I did everything I need to, and if I missed something I'll make sure to get it done by the end of next week. My consult with the RE is about a week after my procedure to determine my plan moving forward. 

Son updates: My son got a not so great report from daycare this week. Basically, he has been potty training for almost 6 months. He had 3 accidents on Friday. He has been having trouble pooping in the potty, and has had trouble with constipation for the last 3 months. His teachers believe he is capable of pooping in the potty and does sometimes (same as at home), but he is not going on the potty at school and at home they believe because he does not want to and doesn't care. They aren't sure what else to do. We talked about bringing some more rewards into school (I already brought some trucks for him), but also starting to take things away if he refuses. I am not sure this is the right thing to do, but I also am not sure what else to try. I guess I need to talk to the pediatrician as well. They said he is one of the oldest still struggling with this, and it does appear he is capable but not doing it. It's frustrating to be dealing with this. 

General: I've just been feeling really stressed the last few days. I couldn't go out with my neighborhood mom friends last night because I didn't have a babysitter with my husband working, and I didn't feel comfortable asking grandparents to watch my son from 7:30 at night until 10:30 or later. I'm glad I didn't go because I ended up falling asleep in bed on my phone at like 10:15. I was tired from everything this week - lots of meetings, lots of things to juggle, my son's issues and my own appointments and stress. Everyone makes it sound like I need to just be able to relax but it's actually impossible. 

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